Queen Mab's opening lines

In P.B. Shelley's letters, Thomas Peacock annotates that Shelley had sent Byron a pamphlet of his poem Queen Mab [quot. marks] long before they actually met [add source]. Byron greatly admired the opening lines. Now, the actual opening lines were a dedication to Harriet, but I think Peacock must mean the poem itself:

HOW wonderful is Death,        Death, and his brother Sleep! 

 One, pale as yonder waning moon        With lips of lurid blue;        The other, rosy as the morn      When throned on ocean's wave            It blushes o'er the world;      Yet both so passing wonderful! 

How could you make your opening paragraph more engaging? Also, you need a conclusion.